How Can I be Happy When Things Are Going SO BAD?
Updated: Oct 28, 2018
When your four letter word count is up and you simply do not have the patience, inspiration or stamina for one more freaking thing to go wrong... How do you handle one more thing? I used to joke - you know the saying "God only gives you as much as you can handle?" Well, I always said 'God thinks the world of me, he gave me so much to handle, he must think I am super competent." While the entire time I was really thinking for goodness sakes ENOUGH ALREADY! All kidding aside though, some days I didn't know if I could handle one more thing. One day I found myself in a balled up heap on my living room floor crying my eyes out all by myself in front of a fireplace that I couldn't keep lit. Yet other days, I would find myself belt sanding the entire floor in my foyer and re-staining and painting the entire room transforming it into my version of a castle. One day as I was heading down a sad road and feeling overwhelmed and about to crash yet again, I thought about what the day spent balled up crying had accomplished... the answer - pretty much nothing except swollen eyes and complete exhaustion. And then I thought about the belt sander day and what that had accomplished - same sadness, same overwhelming feelings but I took that energy and spent some time alone with my thoughts and the drowning sound of a belt sander in the background and I got shit done. Instead of letting my lonely get me down, I took my alone time and made it into a productive weekend that I could be proud of. I'm not going to lie and say there isn't a tear or two, and a little bit of blood mixed into the paint on that foyer floor, but when I walk into my home each time, I smile because I owned that little piece of my life and I am damned proud of what I did. I have to admit the crying day felt good too though, I gave myself the time I needed to grieve for feeling less than adequate at the moment. But what I learned was that after crying... I should have grabbed a sander. Using that experience as a teaching tool, I now try to take my down time, or alone time, or a time where I feel bad and I transform it into something that I will feel good about. This blog post is a somber moment, it's a moment where I am struggling a bit in my business and instead of going to bed early and feeling sorry for myself I am digging in and reaching out to others in the world who might be having a similar experience to let them know they are not alone. Polly Friggin' Anna
I was called a "Polly-Friggin'-Anna once by someone who was not a morning person. Each day I greeted my colleagues with an upbeat "Good Morning" and I bounced into work. I wasn't necessarily wide awake and chipper I was just being pleasant. Knowing that the mood was often somber when I went into work each day, I thought I would spread a little sunshine or a smile or two to kick off the day.
Some people don't have what it takes to be a Polly-Friggin'-Anna, some just want to stay miserable. Don't get me wrong here, I was not always in a chipper mood, I was just as tired, or hungover, or uninspired to work as my colleagues were some days, but my thought was... "Why should we spend the day miserable?". What is the point of being miserable of you could have a perfectly pleasant day instead? There are times where miserable fits, like when you have the flu or when your dog dies, or when your kid craps the bed. But there are lots of reasons to be happy as well. Just Try!It's not always easy to be happy when things are not going your way. But just Try. You don't even have to try hard. Just start with one thing - just one little thing - something you like. For example - Wow this coffee is good today - who cares if you spilled it down your shirt, it smells great doesn't it? Just find one thing that is good about the situation your'e in. Hey it doesn't even need to be good for you, just good in general. The one I like to use is Liquid Sunshine. Sure rain can be a drag if you've planned an outing or a day at the beach... but it sure is a good day to be a duck. Eventually one thing will be two things and two will be three and then you'll find yourself finding more things that make you happy. If you can't find things that make you happy try to think of things or list things that you are grateful for.Dig deep, list new things each day. It sounds suer silly, it really does, but when you start to recognize how n=many things actually do make you happy and grateful your perspective starts to change. So when things seem BAD, just look for one thing... JUST ONE.